|The Grouches “Mad at MS”|
This past Saturday I participated in the Mud Run Twin Cities benefiting the National Multiple Sclerosis Society. Our team of six brave–or foolhardy women–however you choose to look at it, joined the fray of hundreds of eager teams chomping at the bit to run approximately six miles of wickedly rough and steep terrain, dotted with dozens and dozens of mud pits, puddles, boulders, logs, hurdles, and military style obstacles. Sound like fun yet?
When I first signed up, I naively believed the word “Mud” in the title was just one of those unnecessary adjectives writers tend to throw in to spice things up–maybe describing what could happen if it rained. Like some people call their porch a “Mud Room.” Is this room literally filled with mud? No. Not so with the Mud Run at Trollhaugen Ski Resort. It is literally filled with mud. The entire woods–FULL OF MUD. Mud holes, muddy rocks, muddy ponds, mud bogs, mud puddles, mud paths, mud slides.
I remember getting dirty as a kid. I don’t remember ever getting this dirty. I didn’t know it was possible to get this dirty. Even that guy on “Dirty Jobs” never got this dirty.
I wore military jungle boots and pants because that’s what the website suggested as appropriate attire. My teammates did not take the suggestion to heart as I did. They wore tennis shoes and wimpy little capri pants. What can I say? They were lucky to come out of the woods still fully clothed. The mud bogs very nearly sucked our legs off, much less our shoes. But I was totally prepared. I’ve watched The Princess Bride many times and know all about lightening sand, flame spurts, and rodents of unusual size. The only one of those we didn’t deal with was the R.O.U.S’s — but that’s just because they obviously had all died in the mud bogs. The smell of dead things and sewage was unmistakable as we crawled under logs placed across the water and let the slime ooze over us. What a special treat that was.
I was glad to hear on the morning news that this is “National Spa week,” although our team started a day early. I’m pretty sure Saturday’s mud baths will prove to be tremendously helpful in giving us all younger looking skin. The decaying properties alone should peel away years and years. Of course some of our teammates can’t afford to peel away too many years or they’ll be back in high school. I received an added spa bonus. The blonde highlights in my hair were magically turned to orange from the mud. So, I even got a free hair color change just in time for fall. Is that awesome, or what?
The Mud Run was hard, painful at times, and definitely down and dirty, but it was also fun and exciting to run with a team of women who “had my back.” I’m quite sure that if I fell from the rope wall, they would have helped me limp to a waiting ambulance. After all, when my jungle boot was sucked down to the bottom of a mud bog, they did stop and pull me out. I don’t know how they managed with those wimpy tennis shoes though…